The Compassionate Communication model is based on US-based Dr. Marshal Rosenberg’s “Non-Violent Communication” model.
The model distinguishes between facts and interpretations using the individual’s unique perception and point of view. It assists the individual in acknowledging personal needs in being emphatic and in finding creative ways to receive the proper response to personal needs and the needs of others.
The model helps us gain insight in the following ways:
It distinguishes between facts and personal interpretation
It develops a person’s awareness of one’s personal feelings and knowledge of how to adjust them properly
It helps to identify personal needs and the needs of others in various situations
It translates needs into focused requests
It creates an understanding that effective communication is the best solution
The model is used in a dialogue that consists on 4 stages that culminate with a request rather that a dictated action.
Stating a request is a four-part process rooted in honesty:
Describe your observation
Identify your feeling
Explain the reason for your feelings in terms of your needs
State your request
In describing the situation, do so without criticizing or judging. If you have come home from a busy day and your partner seems preoccupied with the newspaper, simply describe the situation: "When I walked in the door after an especially trying day, you seemed busy reading." Identify your feeling: "I feel hurt." State the reason for your feeling: "I feel hurt because I would like to feel close to you right now and instead I'm feeling disconnected from you." Then state your request in do-able terms: "Are you willing to take time out for a hug and a few moments of sharing?"